Viva! Soy un millonario!

22 11 2010

Now that I am a millionaire, I will…

  • Still work in the office as a Researcher. I don’t want anyone to think that I’ve gone conceited because of my easily earned wealth. I’ll still work there because I want to answer questions like, “Why do you still work here, when you can practically buy the Company?” with “I want to remain grounded. I built a family in this job as a researcher and the wealth that I’ve earned is nothing compared to the relationships I had built working in this company. Besides, I want to keep myself busy aside from the trips my butler has set for me for the whole year.”
  • Learn how to speak Spanish and start talking to anyone I look down to in Spanish like in Soap Operas where the Hacienderos converse to their slaves. “Tonta” or “Vamos, Indios”!
  • Buy a car. Just one car to drive myself to work. The limo is for when I’m too lazy to drive for myself.
  • Buy a yacht and invite everyone to a party. I’ll invite Oprah Winfrey and tell her that I’m buying her. I’ll invite Willie Revillame and have him bend over while everyone pins a tail on his arse!
  • Buy a timeslot on ABS-CBN. I’ll make sure it’s the primetime slot. This is where I’ll air all my video-blogs.
  • Have Vicky Bello perform a liposuction on me and make David Beckham dip nachos on my fat so I’ll be the sexiest man alive.
  • Announce that August __, is the international day to adore me. All posters in EDSA should be brought down and replaced by pictures of me from when I was a baby until I’m all grown up. A program will then be held in MOA concert grounds to be hosted by Toni Gonzaga and Mariel Rodriguez to honor my existence.